As Christians, many of us have at some point made grand promises to God.
We say, “God, I’m going to evangelize everyone I meet. I’ll read my Bible daily, obey my parents, never rebel, and always strive to do what’s right, all for you.”
We build this image of being God’s “star child,” believing that by doing all the right things, we can earn His blessings.
But what happens when life doesn’t go the way we planned?
When hardship, sorrow, and disappointment invade our lives despite our best efforts?
This false belief, that God is obligated to reward us for our good deeds, has weighed heavily on my faith journey.
I didn’t realize how deeply it had influenced my perspective until recently, when I revisited the story of Lazarus.
The Lie Exposed: God Owes Me for My Obedience
Let’s dive into John 11, the story of Lazarus.
We know the familiar ending: Lazarus, a close friend of Jesus, dies, and Jesus raises him from the dead.
But before the miracle happens, the story reveals something profound about expectations, faith, and God’s purpose.
When Mary and Martha sent word to Jesus that Lazarus was ill, they approached him with an understandable assumption: “Jesus, your friend, the one you love, is sick. Come heal him.”
Yet, surprisingly, Jesus stayed where He was for two more days before going to Lazarus. This delay led to Lazarus’ death.
Imagine being in Mary’s shoes. She must have thought, “If Jesus loves us, why didn’t He come right away? Why did He let Lazarus die?” These questions resonate with many of us.
We assume that if we are close to God, if we obey Him, pray, and live rightly, then He will make our lives smooth and free of pain.
When life doesn’t match our expectations, it feels like betrayal.
The lie I believed was that if I worked hard enough to please God, He would be obligated to reward me with the life I wanted, success, happiness, easy relationships, and freedom from hardship.
I lived as though I could manipulate God’s blessings through my own efforts.
Jesus’ Response to Suffering
When Jesus finally arrived, Mary expressed her disappointment: “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” This sentiment is all too familiar. “God, if you had been here, my marriage wouldn’t have fallen apart.
If you had been here, my finances wouldn’t be in ruins. If you had been here, my loved one wouldn’t have passed away.”
What’s striking about Jesus’ response is that He didn’t dismiss her pain.
Instead, He wept. The shortest verse in the Bible, “Jesus wept” (John 11:35), reveals His deep compassion for our suffering.
He mourned not only for the loss of His friend Lazarus but also for the pain Mary and others felt. Jesus knew He would raise Lazarus, yet He still grieved alongside them.
This shows us that God is not indifferent to our pain. He is deeply moved by our sorrow, even as He works out His greater purposes.
The Truth: Pain Has a Purpose
In John 11:4, Jesus explained, “This illness does not lead to death; it is for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it.” The purpose of Lazarus’ illness—and even his death—was to bring glory to God.
It wasn’t about meeting Mary and Martha’s expectations; it was about fulfilling a divine plan far greater than they could understand.
This truth is difficult to accept: God allows pain, hardship, and even loss to accomplish His purposes. Our suffering is not purposeless. Through it, God is glorified, and we are drawn closer to Him.
For years, I believed that if I did everything right, God would reward me with a perfect life.
But that’s not how God works. He is not a vending machine where we deposit good works and receive blessings in return.
He is writing a story that glorifies Him—and that often involves molding us through challenges and struggles.
Letting Go of Control
The story of Lazarus challenged me to release my false expectations of God.
I had to confront the reality that my “good works” were not a bargaining chip to get what I wanted from Him.
Instead, I needed to trust that God’s plan—though often mysterious and painful—was better than anything I could imagine.
This shift in perspective has been freeing. I no longer approach God with a list of demands, expecting Him to reward my efforts.
Instead, I come to Him with open hands, ready to embrace whatever He has for me. Even in pain, I know He is present, compassionate, and working for His glory.
A New Way Forward
If you’ve been living under the weight of this same lie, I encourage you to let it go.
It won’t be easy; it takes time to reframe how we view God and His role in our lives.
But when we release our false expectations, we can truly experience the freedom of trusting Him fully.
Pain and suffering are not signs of God’s absence or lack of love.
They are opportunities for us to lean into Him, to see His glory, and to be molded into the people He created us to be.
God doesn’t promise us a life free of hardship, but He does promise to walk with us through it, weeping with us and strengthening us.
Friend, drop the lie. Trust God not for what He can give you but for who He is.
He loves you deeply, He is compassionate toward your pain, and He is using every moment of your life for His glory.
Final Thoughts
As you reflect on this story, remember that God’s ways are higher than ours. His plans may not align with our desires, but they are always good.
Rest in His grace, let go of your striving, and allow Him to work in your life in ways that bring glory to Him.
If this message resonated with you, feel free to share it with others who might be struggling with similar doubts.
Thank you for reading, and may God bless you richly as you walk with Him.